Haven't written in a while because I haven't felt like I could do much more than complain. Or rant. Still feeling that way, but hopefully no one will read this anyway, so who cares? Quite frankly, I feel like things are spiraling down the toilet. The country, the economy, our personal finances flushed a long time ago. There is such an oppressive feeling of pessimism that I can't seem to shake off. While I feel for those who are currently unemployed, how about a husband who goes to work every day, but never gets a paycheck? Every week he tells me there should be money coming in and he will get a check. Every week. For the past 10 weeks now. Quite frankly, I don't know how some people sleep at night. He gets a job, he does the job, and is then told, sorry, we don't have the money to pay you for your work. Every. Single. Time. The poor guy is so depressed it's not funny. It is not a good feeling to see a strong man near tears. For the past six months we've lived off a loan and our retirement accounts. We're almost tapped out.

What is Obama doing for us? Destroying us. Stretching out this economic nightmare with his socialist games in order to destroy the very people he needs to fund his far-flung programs. Last year we paid 30,000 in taxes. This year we're getting money back. Which is really funny, since we did mostly disbursements last year and hardly paid any taxes. I wonder how it will work next year when we have no income at all? At this rate, IF things turn around we will be so far in debt and have so little in our retirement accounts, if anything, that we may never recover. I alternate between anger and despair. I'm so depressed that most of the time I'm just going through the motions. Not living, but not quite dead yet. Often wishing that I was.